I stood still surrounded by over 100 people swept away by the Father’s love. There in this room, in the midst of disappointment, fear, and doubt – He met me. I came face to face with my Father.

In that moment I opened up my heart.

“I’m tired. I don’t want to be around all these people. I’m uncomfortable and doubting you calling me here. In my heart I know you did, but my mind is climbing the walls of my heart and shooting me down with arrows of doubt. Help me. What do you want to show me? Why am I here?”

Quietly, my father put his arm around me and whispered,

“Just give me these 9 months. You + Me. Let me show you how much I love you despite the fact you are completely undeserving. Give me this. Set your heart in my hands. I brought you here to be with you.”

This was my experience the first community night here at YWAM LA. It was intense and I wasn’t in the right state of mind to process it right.

It’s been two weeks since that night and so much has changed.

Classes started and we hit the ground running. My weeks have me consumed by the Bible. Almost every free moment is spent dissecting and interpreting Genesis and Exodus chapter by chapter, verse by verse. And, honestly, it’s been the most exhausting yet energizing experience.

I’m so busy and so focused that I don’t have time to really process what I’m learning, but when I begin to tell people about what I’m learning I realize how much information I am retaining and how much impact this Book is having on my heart, my mindset, and my life.

It’s quite a spectacular thing.